The question of whether to share a home with your parents, after marrying, is best left to the individual as it can either be a good or bad option depending on circumstances. However, if your parents are extremely traditional and don’t cease to meddle in your married life, then it is preferable to get a separate house with your spouse as soon as possible. But if you are still budgeting for a new house, then think about starting your life with your parents.
In this piece, we hope to demonstrate why it is important in our day and age for married couples to live apart from their parents. Let’s dig in.
1) Wife’s In-Laws Stress
Married couples who live with their parents close to them suffer the consequences of their wives struggling a lot due to their husbands’ its parents, more often than not. This is better said in cases when they both have just newly tied the knot. As newlyweds, you should be able to flaunt your loved one enough to create a bond between you two. Otherwise, with parents in the picture, this becomes an issue.
Often, the wife’s voice goes unheard regarding her challenges because there are societal factors that influence her. This, however, does not mean that she has to lie to protect the in-laws’ feelings. Most of the time, she will just sabotage her own feelings and make sure that she doesn’t have to go through the pain of worrying them. Such a space allows her to cancel their own worries and talk to her husband instead which in return strengthens their relationship.
2) Men Can Complete Their Share Of The Housework
Even now, a good number of parents belonging in the Indian community get made by the notion that she is a housewife so she must manage the house. This makes it possible for men out of the house to take care of their wives because in their absence they can share these chores. When a couple lives in their own home, all of those thoughts will certainly cause no stress.
As a result, making men help out with the housework became commonplace. This particularly helps working mothers when they have to deal with many other grievances. It causes the couple to grow closer, as satisfying there needs becomes a shared responsibility leading to improvement in their married life.
3) More Discretion of Couples
One of the many worries of a married couple cohabiting with their parents is Lack of privacy. For instance, with the parents in the picture, there might be activities that couples may not be able to partake in due to feeling embarrassed. Many parents want to keep track of their children’s movements and activities at all times. Even more so considering the fact that their kids have just gotten married; even though they do it out of love, the newly married couple might feel like they have no room to breathe.
In order to be able to have a meaningful relationship, it is best for the couple to stay away from their parents and find their own house to live in.
4) Awareness of Each Other’s Requirements
It is important to set time aside to spend with your spouse in order to know one another’s needs. It is a key element in a normal marriage. But, when you and your spouse stay under the same roof with your parents, then such a thing is hard to do. Every family is meant to be together but living with ones parents and spending time with your spouse at the same time proves to be very difficult.
For example, if this keeps going on, many feelings like feeling insecure or resentment may be developed. Work, household chores, and stress will keep you apart with no time to relax. If partner gets no quality time together to dissipate their days thoughts, then it could end up with unfounded suspicion which could rapidly evolve into an all tormented feeling.
This is why it is important to consider moving out. In this scenario, you two will have enough time to talk and know each other better so that the relationship blossens.
5) Compatibility of the couple seems to improve.
Disputes between the couple is easily inevitable no matter how much you both love each other. No matter how considerate you are for your wife some arguments would still come up. Still, if out of the love and consideration both of you agree to find a solution to the argument applying empathy, the whole relationship becomes warmer and all firmer.
It is not only awkward but unproductive as well to try to talk things out with one’s partner in front of the parents. Normally, both of you withdraw from the conversation in order not to make your parents anxious. So while everything seems to be in order without any big fights, such practicality hurts the relationship.
Additionally, in the presence of the parents, they urge their children’s discussion and even assist in fixing the issue at hand. If they offer you a solution, you might choose not to argue any further, but that does not actually help the situation. Because the two of you failed to present your views on the cause of the argument, it does very little to foster a relationship between the two of you.
In order to increase your compatibility, you have to learn how to argue without going the extreme and work on getting along with your partner better by relocating to a new house together.
6) Self-sufficient Couple Living
Incorporating your parents in your married life has some drawbacks or benefits that one of the partners prefers to ignore. Couples start to feel that they are being resumed and they cannot fully express themselves with each other.
Couples moving into a different house does take away some of the pressure. You feel free to communicate and argue and also come to the conclusion of the argument without feeling like being monitored. For instance, out of in-law pressure, your wife will not feel overwhelmed whenever you do some chores around the house, and you will be able to do chores without being judged. Generally speaking, you will have the freedom to live your life the way you want to with your spouse.
7) Wrapping it All Together
We have previously pointed out a handful of reasons that support the idea of a married couple living away from their parents. Despite the fact that there are certain positives of staying with parents, the drawbacks are usually too many, especially for newly married couples or those with rather traditional parents.
There could, however, be situations where parents have no choice but to live with you, but you may wish to move after a couple of years. In the end, the decision is yours. Don’t be too lenient or too strict and be sensible while weighing the options.
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